What Now?

sunsetMy fingers settle on the keyboard and I’m not sure what to write or where to start. Somehow though my thoughts always seem to translate to letters, words and sentences dancing across the screen, chasing the blinking cursor as I begin to type. This week has been one of those exasperating weeks for me. Have you ever had one of those weeks where it just seems like one thing after another happens? Where just as you brush of one seemingly piece of bad luck another one creeps up to knock you down again? And, you think to yourself, what now?

In the whole scheme of the universe, these tiny foibles aren’t catastrophes by any means…I called Delta to check on my daughter’s flight credit for her cancelled Costa Rica trip and the airline has no record of the ticket number her travel company gave me…my central air conditioning died during a heat wave…my dog needs prescription food that cost $45/6lbs…the earpiece to my glasses fell off…my health insurance company is dropping my primary care physician’s organization…my shoulder won’t stop aching. None of these trip-ups by themselves are Earth-shattering and one my even call them “first-world” problems. There are a lot worse things going on in the world right now, so who am I complain about my small hiccups. Yet, one by one these as these little set backs began to pile on, I found myself feeling discouraged and a bit unsettled.

You see, a couple of weeks ago during the Pivot and Rise Mastermind course I’m taking, Diana Patton, my instructor shared with us how she had been under attack since she began teaching the course. She talked about a series of unfortunate events that had happened to her that week. She explained how she was under attack and how these attacks caused her to feel doubt about teaching the class. However, she then shared how she was able to turn each of those incidents upside down and find the positive in them and not let them distract her from her truth. She warned that the same would happen to us. When she first talked about being under attack, I admit I was skeptical. Was she under attack or was it just coincidence? However, after experiencing this phenomena myself, I’m not so sure. Honestly, thinking about an invisible force in the universe, attacking me freaks me out just a tab (well, more than a tad). But is it a coincidence that just as I am becoming more and more in touch with my authentic self and finding my voice, that I too feel under attack? And aren’t these incidents distracting me from continuing my journey to becoming who I’m called to be?

I can easily dwell on the negative dips and digs that happen in and around my life. However, I can also choose to look for those silver linings and focus on the positve light in my life instead. For if there is negative energy out there, throwing obstacles in my way, then I equally know that there is also positve energy lighting my path for I have seen it…in my youngest daugter’s giggles as she runs through the sprinkler to cool off in the heat…in the smile that crosses my oldest daughter’s face as she tells me about the antics of the children she’s babysitting this summer…in my boyfriend’s comforting embrace as we share a glass of wine and enjoy the sunshine on the deck…in the unexpected red bird appearing out of no where to sit on a railing on a quiet morning…in the beauty of a sunset after a storm..in the knowing that I feel confident and good about the direction my life is going and who I am.

I am strong. I am resilient. I am grateful. I am ready. I am unstoppable. I am enough.

Published by

Shar

Tech writing pays my bills, but creative writing feeds my soul. I've been a writer as long as I can remember. It's one of my passions in life. Lucky for me, it's also my job! I love dogs, photography, ice cream and being a mom.

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